Did she really just ask me that?

Ok yall this is just random so I feel like I had to share it with you :)

Story:
Went to my mom's job just to say hey and see how she was doing.

Me: I think I'm gonna do a sew-in after I take these twists down.
Mom: Oh so your going back to the perm? (smiling)
Me: (wtf look on my face) No what does a perm have to do with me getting a weave?
Mom: I thought your hair had to be straight for that.
Me: No and I'm doing a full weave.
Mom: Oh

Point of this story see my mom swore up and down after I bc'd that I would perm my hair within the next year. AInt Happenin!!!! I love my naps but I really wanna give them a rest and my split ends got a lot better since the trim and protective styling.

My Hair Story

If you haven't already figured it out I am natural, and I have been for about almost 9 months. Im proud of my decision and Im glad I made it so soon. I don't even mind to stares I get when I'm in public or comments from my friends and family. The self confidence I have makes all the backlash worth it :) When I look back on how I used to view myself and my hair it seems like I always had a nappy head mentality. What I mean by that is that I was never one of those girls running to the salon to get a perm. I loved and appreciated all types of hairstyles. Hair to me was just another form of expression like art or music. I would stretch my perms out for months with braids or extentsions when I was in high school. I was really critical about my hair's healthy and spent a lot of time reading hair magazines and picking my cousin/hair stylist's brain for ideas. I stopped using heat on my hair, onlying wet setting my hair once a week, did a deep conditioner every 2 weeks, protein treatment and wrapped my hair every night. My hair's health was really good, but I knew I wanted more. I felt like I wasnt really expressing who I was with my hair instead I was doing something because it's what someone else told me was right. I never understood why it was necessary for me to perm my hair. I wondered what was wrong with my hair that I had to get a perm. Did I have bad hair? or was it just ugly? Why was a perm the only way my hair could be pretty? I even considered the idea that maybe I just didn't have what people classified as "good" hair.

My mom permed my hair starting at age 3 because she couldn't handle pressing my hair. Now yall don't jump on my mama cuz I love her, but she just combed it through and washed it out to loosen the curl. I can't fault her because she was doing what she knew she could handle. When I was in middle school I asked my mom could I grow dreads and she said I could do whatever I wanted to my hair when I was 18. I snuck some colored hair into my braids when I was about 13 lol. But on my 18th b-day I spent the weekend with my godsister and got highlights :) I surprised my mom at church but she liked it. For graduation I cut my hair up to my neck and I loved that as well. I got my last perm the week before graduation and havent turned back since.

When I look in the mirror, all I see is me. No one else tells me what to wear or how to style my hair (mostly because they don't know how to do my hair :). I can't even begin to describe the freedom I feel with my natural hair now, but I will say this... If your considering embarking on this journey know that you will be questioned, insulted, misunderstood, and talked about even by those closest to you. But keep in my that this journey is strictly about you. Educate yourself and find others that share the same interests as you.

Why Are We Always Hatin?

Just in case you haven't read it yet Essence magazine has a really fascinating article about black women and our lack of sisterhood, "Black Women Behaving Badly" by Kierno Mayo. I have always wondered why as black women do we feel like we need to hate on each other and cut ourselves down. I mean we used to fight for our lives, family, and virtues side by side. What happened to that? What Changed? Is it the surge of reality tv shows that pit our sisters against us while we battle for the affections of some celebrity. Is it that age old saying that "there aren't enough black men to go around." I'll talk about that more later though. I guess this subject really hit home with me because of the incident I witnessed when my uncle, my cousin, and I went to the gas station. My cousin and I got out of the car to walk inside the mini mart. Meanwhile the chicks on the side of us were clearly beefing with some girls across the lot. Needless to say by the time we got outside the brawl had esscalated. As we approached my uncle's car I noticed a girl with a knife, another with a bat, and one with a grey goose bottle. They proceeded to pound and stab a girl who found herself on the floor in the midst of the fighting. And may I also point out that there were plenty of guys around that could've broken this up but instead they were either video taping it or egging the fight on. People this is not how I expect my daughters to act. Not that I am against self defense, especially if someone is endangering your life, but this degree of bloodlust had to have been prompted by more than just bad feelings. Why are we always up in arms against one another when this is clearly a method of society to break down the bonds of our heritage as African Americans? Read the article, post your thoughts, and please learn to love yourself and your sisters.

New Outlook

Until recently I assumed that there was no one who could really be happy with me the way I am. If it wasn't for a certain someone that entered my life last year I would not have grown nearly as much as I have now. I feel that I know what I want and expect out of any person that I become romantically involved with. There's no reason why anyone should settle for less when you know what you really want. I'm so grateful for my new love and his capacity to love me back. Its crazy how hard we search for love and then it just pops outta nowhere and knocks you over the head. I had been giving this guy the run around for a while but I finally gave in two days ago and I'm so happy that I did. Can't wait to see what happens next but right now I'm just enjoying the ride.